July 7, 2009

Beards

The newest muscle
not only impresses girls,
but hides your acne.


Williamsburg Woods

In a plaid forest
is the only place you'll find
skinny lumberjacks.

July 6, 2009

It's True

We've added the "o"
so that little asterisk?
it can kiss my butt.

July 5, 2009

Most People's Definition of "Sharing Music"

Magical subways:
here even earbuds blossom
into loud flowers.

July 4, 2009

Obama

Easier for us,
but he's made life harder for
the punks and rappers.

July 3, 2009

Postmortem Success Stories

We should envy pigs:
even after slaughter, they're
multi-talented.

July 2, 2009

This Could Happen To Anybody

Sitting in the park,
I turn, inquisitively.
Their dog's named Colin?!?

July 1, 2009

Starving

I'm getting cranky.
The proverbial chili's
ready to seat us.